You could go to therapy if you're overly stressed, for personal development or simply because you want someone to talk to. And take a long, long breath out. It doesn't need to be ornamented. I need help. Maybe your doctor told you that you need to see a therapist before you can start to medically transition (starting hormone blockers, hormone replacement therapy . Too many contentious. 6 Things You Should Say To Someone With Cancer . When you don't know what to say, or feel at a loss for words, here are 5 things you can do instead: Give yourself permission to be ok with silence. You might say something like, "Some of the things that are concerning to me is that you haven't gone to the gym in over a month, and you usually go three times a week." If you have personal positive experience with therapy, you can bring that up, or start a conversation about the unfortunate stigma around mental health and going to therapy. What Not to Say to Someone in Rehab But you have to tell someone they need therapy in a careful, loving way, so they respond positively. Your presence alone can offer an unspoken comfort that may not be as easily achieved with words. Any time I hear someone say their friend or loved one "should" go to therapy it sounds like a condemnation, and that's contributing to the stigma that surrounds psychotherapy. What Do I Say When…? In fact, no two people will think or feel the same way as the next person. If you feel like this it can help to: Start your next session by telling your therapist how you felt after your last session, and give them a chance to reflect with you and offer support. Sometimes therapy sessions can bring up feelings that are difficult to cope with, and you might feel nervous about going back, or like you want to quit. Some people are afraid of therapy, or not ready to admit that they have a problem. When you notice someone overwhelmed with emotion, reach out. There is nothing that a person can say to cure depression in someone else, but being supportive and a good listener can help. A default first session of therapy will be just that -- the default for that individual therapist, Bertoli says. Sponsor: Visit GoDaddy.com to get the right domain for your business. "You could say, 'I don't know what to say, and I'm afraid, but I do care about you.'" Rather than trying to find . I mean, I'm going through a lot of physical problems that are leading to getting behind in my studies and causing anxiety, and it'd be nice if my best friend was around to talk to. But you have to tell someone they need therapy in a careful, loving way, so they respond positively. You've put in a lot of effort into working on your stability and it shows. Although therapists have a reputation for dealing with mental health issues, you might find therapy useful even if your problems are more surface-level. If your wife does go (which she should! Use offer code qdt28 to g But it varies from person to person. Can someone make you go to therapy? So start by explaining a little bit about the way you've been feeling lately.Tell them you believe that having proper support and educated advice is the best route to take for many reasons, some of which you might want to share too. "I know this is difficult, but I am proud of you.". I feel like that's what friends do. You don't have much to complain about, and at the moment life is good. Someone is Talking about Suicide Suicide can be an anxiety-provoking topic. Typically, people with dementia ask to "go home" when they are feeling unsure or uncomfortable in their surroundings. It will be tempting to say something like, "It's going to be OK," and while the line is certainly well-intentioned, things really might not be OK . If they're actively suicidal and seem likely to hurt themselves or someone else: Call 911 or the National Suicide Prevention Hotline (1-800-273-8255) and say something like this to the operator: "I'm with a friend, and I'm concerned she's suicidal. "You are in my thoughts and . So there's a very good chance you will know someone, maybe a family member or friend, who has been touched by it. When we see someone we care about suffering, our instinct is often to try to fix it. It . The terms "anorexic" and "bulimic" were created and have been used wrongly. Some just have a free-flowing conversation, and some actually follow an intake form or questionnaire to get started. We can be the ones to write the words or send the laugh in an encouragement card that helps someone through a rough day—or a whole tough season of life. So start by explaining a little bit about the way you've been feeling lately.Tell them you believe that having proper support and educated advice is the best route to take for many reasons, some of which you might want to share too. Both counseling and therapy use discussion between the client and the mental health professional to help the client address emotional, mental, or behavioral issues and solve problems.. In reality, therapy is a conversation, and it's ok if that communication isn't always verbal. One of the best ways to address a relapse is to take steps to avoid future relapse, and identifying relapse triggers is a great way to accomplish this. When encouraging someone to try therapy, "There's a tendency to be cautious, euphemistic, and so on," Seligman says, noting many of us tend to "buy into our [loved ones'] shame" around the idea of going to therapy. Attend appointments together. There are things you shouldn't say to someone with dementia, but also things you shouldn't say about them. Just like people shop around for doctors they like or find a specialist for them, you do the same with a therapist. How to support someone who's grieving. Worried that if you go to a counsellor, they'll say you're making a fuss about nothing? Some will do background, so they'll understand your childhood and any medical issues. Some therapists might jump right in, but for many therapist-patient pairs, the first session is mostly a get-to-know-you session—a first date, if you will. Offer to go with them until they're comfortable. Say "I really have no words." or "I feel quiet." (Avoid saying "I don't know.". Breathe. What to Say to a Friend Leaving for Rehab. The bereaved struggle with many intense and painful emotions, including depression, anger, guilt, and profound sadness. Check for distress Your friend may be worried about what the appointments will be like, particularly if they suffer from anxiety or depression. In today's post, we'll review some of the ways you can help someone see they need therapy. Click To Tweet Any of this sound familiar? Rather than indulge such shame by dancing around the subject, he suggests, "try to make the optimistic . Take a slow, deep breath…. Now, I am not alone. 9 Ways You Can Help Make a Difference 1. Yet, by going on this journey, you can get to a place where you will find not happiness, but, perhaps resolution for whatever issue troubles you. Some will just listen and say 'Uh huh' a lot, and will be a . "I'm here for you." Show up for your loved ones and remain by their side as they go through this process. "When someone we love is going through pain and sorrow, we feel pressure to have to say something, to come up with a way to make them feel better," Habash says. If you've just learned that a friend is leaving for rehab or addiction treatment, here's a few lines you can use if you get tongue-tied: "I hope you get better soon.". Other than in the case of children or individuals in some kind of incapacity where they can't advocate for themselves, we cannot impose on others treatments—even if they stand to benefit from them—unless they make the decision on their own. Committing people to a hospital against their will is not only rare, it's part of a process that involves the legal system. The other person might turn down your help or say they're fine. If you are a parent, guardian, friend, intimate partner, or loved one of someone who is going through a difficult time and needs therapeutic assistance, it can be challenging to know how, exactly . Don't say "I know exactly how you feel." No one can understand what someone is going through unless they have experienced the same loss themselves. The idea of a colleague, friend, or loved one talking about killing themselves or "wanting to die" can be even more overwhelming and scary. You and your therapist delve into some combination of: Example of how anxiety showed up in the last week. 5 Things to Say When Someone Has an Eating Disorder: 1. And I am all for . It just needs to be real. Regardless of your goal, chances are you'll come out of it with a . And if you say these words, make sure you mean them, and support them through thick and thin. There are a lot of reasons that my clients come to see me (client is the word I use to talk about the people who I treat; some therapists say 'patients', some say 'patrons'). If you're dealing with a specific issue, you may want to go for a certain amount of sessions — 10 session, six months, etc. In general, the difference between counseling and therapy is merely one of semantics. 2. Laws vary by state, but most patients who are committed to a hospital . In last week's episode, we covered 5 common myths about therapy, including how to deal with macho men who think therapy is for the weak, the three things that can get you hospitalized, and much more. People who have been sexually assaulted experience a range of emotions. As a marriage and family therapist he can help you navigate the challenges of post-divorce life, including how to support your children, and co-parent with your Ex. Offer a hug or a gentle pat on the back, and just be present. Unfortunately cancer affects many people. This can take time, and may not lead in directions that are pleasant. You don't have to know how to solve their problem; you only need to show you care. "Sometimes people get frustrated because they're starting at zero and want to be at 10, and that's going to be a very long road," clinical psychologist Merav Gur, Ph.D., tells SELF.These . These indicators may be a sign that your friend or family member is in crisis. It can help you get to the root cause of why you feel the way you do. "Her dementia is getting worse.". If that's the case currently then you may have decided to send them a card, note or flowers during this extremely difficult time. If the difficulty of someone's situation has you feeling stumped about what to say, keep reading. 1 in 3 of us will suffer from it at some point. I resisted therapy for a long time because I had bad experiences. But often it's best to just listen . But as with saying, "I know how you feel," this response assumes that our experiences are the same and that what worked for us will work for the other person. 7. They point to the individual using drugs and call him or her the "problem." However, seeking your own support allows you to have a safe place for talking, venting, and finding viable solutions. Here are over a dozen good reasons people go to therapy, options for finding an affordable therapist, and ways they help. Practice Empathy. "Grief is not a problem to be solved, it's an experience to be carried," she says. Someone has anorexia, they're not an anorexic. Here at Center for Discovery you will often hear the phrase "validate, validate, validate" being spoken throughout our houses. Although supportive friends can be a comforting resource to have, friends . Make sure to assure them that you won't ask prying questions about the counseling unless they want to share. The first session probably won't get down to the nitty-gritty. "I . Identify Triggers. In fact, their ability to verbally express their feelings out loud is a big step in the right direction. Just think like this.". However, the terms "counseling" and "therapy" are sometimes used in slightly different ways; counseling is more often . Often, the simple act of just seeing or hearing the word spikes personal and societal fears. When all else fails, simple, direct emotion is the most powerful gift you can give a loved one going through pain. Consequently, it is important that you know how to recognize any red flags in your loved one. Many people don't ask for support because they don't want to be a bother to others. Therapy is not an answer to finding happiness. . Our loved ones catch us, daily, and keep us going. "I'd be glad to check your house/apartment for you while you're gone.". Even if two people are experiencing the same type of loss, each person's grief journey will be unique to him or her. 2. 1. Listen to them without judgment and make sure they know they're not alone. READ MORE Crazy Talk: My Therapist Suggested I Commit Myself. If that's the case, it's worth it to talk about what is happening in your life that's working. Hearing from someone that you're worth more than the hell you're going through gives that little sparkle of hope that can help someone through a hard time. 4. I encourage my clients to breathe into their body, following their breath, using breath to help get present in their body, with their feelings. Going to therapy would be like going to the doctor, and instead of taking an MRI to get a clear picture of the issue, you work with your therapist to get a better understanding of the challenges you're facing, to clearly figure out what it is that's going on and then make a plan to treat it. I ask them to scan their body, noticing, without judgment, their physical and emotional feelings. Enter Lori Gottlieb's new book, Maybe You Should Talk to Someone.Gottlieb, an experienced psychotherapist and author of The Atlantic's weekly "Dear Therapist" advice column, gives readers front-row access to what goes on in therapy by following the narratives of four of her clients.We see how she approaches her interactions with them, using her empathy, skill, and humanity to encourage . Too often, when it comes to mental illness, we are afraid to say anything at all — we certainly don't want to say the wrong thing. For those with SAD, it may be a better introduction to therapy than face-to-face encounters. But one thing people seem to be fairly certain about is that in "talk therapy" they should be "talking" and they're doing it wrong or treatment is over if they have nothing to talk about or if there is some silence. I was feeling depressed and even though I had plenty of friends I always felt alone and just overwhelmingly unhappy. People go to therapy for various reasons, such as major life transitions or unhelpful thoughts. It's difficult to see someone you care about struggling, especially when you know they could get help. If you're trying to comfort someone whose family member is dying and he gives you the impression that he doesn't want to talk about it, show your support by joining him in his silence. 9 Ways You Can Help Make a Difference 1. everyone should!) Through therapy, a mental health counselor can help you work. I'm always here for you." Even if you don't entirely understand what your friend is going through, you can still be there for them in a healthy, supportive way. Tell me why you're seeking care. Sometimes, personal wishes are confronting from a professional perspective, as was the case with a patient who didn't want to take morphine to relieve her breathlessness. Some people are scared of seeing a therapist alone or signing up for group therapy. It's difficult to see someone you care about struggling, especially when you know they could get help. Here's what you need to know before your first counselling session: 1. For the example above, you could say "Let's get your shoes on.". The good news is we don't have to leave someone we care about to muddle through alone. I have stuff going on, too, but I still make time to talk to her; it'd be nice to have the same courtesy. Andrea M. Risi, LPC: Many people find it nerve-racking to start therapy, and some people bring up that concern during their first visit.Here may be some reasons for your apprehension: You were in . "People don't want to say the wrong thing," says Cortez Yanez. There aren't many wrong ways for the client to do therapy. Espinoza describes it like this: "I won't ever be the one to say, 'Yes . Beware of Judging Your Therapy Topics. remind her it's okayy if the first one she goes to sucks and she can find a different one. Remember, you can't force anyone to go to therapy if they aren't ready, so respect them if they say no. But some things, including anxiety, can't be fixed by outsiders. Then, the pain eases. "When people are struggling with an issue, they can often feel that it will never get any better. I polled my Facebook community recently, asking those with PTSD what they wish they could hear from loved ones. Instead say: "Let's go to a quieter place or go for a walk." If you want to try to help your friend get out of anxiety mode (and you know them well), you can try grounding them back in . This is the beauty of the Three Magic Phrases: dying people live on as long as we go on remembering them, and repeating the phrases we said to them is a very direct connection. Offering to go to therapy with them or sit next to them during a support group meeting may make the thought of going there easier to fathom. Other than in the case of children or individuals in some kind of incapacity where they can't advocate for themselves, we cannot impose on others treatments—even if they stand to benefit from them—unless they make the decision on their own. True, some people come to therapy to address something specific, like anxiety or depression. "I see you're in pain. 2. You can sit in the waiting room during their first few sessions. A large part of her work is having conversations with patients and their families, letting people have their say and listening, because people's needs are so different. If deciding whether or not to breakup is the main issue, coming to a mutual decision can be the goal of your therapy. Your first therapy or counselling session is probably going to be okay! What to say to someone with a mental health condition. Talk straight. Family therapy; Many family members resist their own treatment. If you're struggling to find the right words, here are 12 kind things to say to someone with cancer: 1. I'm worried she's going to hurt herself. With that in mind, we've put together six things to say when scheduling patient appointments: 1. Many people will say that they can turn to their friends to discuss their problems and that they do not need a therapist. But sometimes, people are just going through a life transition and want someone to talk with and help . 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